First day in Portland. I'm super busy with work so I don't go out in the afternoon. In the evening I take a break and walk to a nearby place called Cacao Drink Chocolate, having decided in advance that I'm going to choose someone with whom to make eye contact at this place.
I walk in and order my drink. There's a mixed group of three at one table, three girls at another table, and a guy reading alone. The mixed group is annoying to listen to, so I decide not to approach them. It's between the three girls and the reading guy, who puts down his book and is either just taking a break or getting ready to leave. I move in on him.
My approach is a little awkward, because as I get up to go to his table he gets up and walks away from it to bus it. I stop him mid-stride and ask him if he's leaving. He says that he's going home, and I tell him not to leave yet, and then I sit down at his table and wait for him to return.
He asks how he can help me, and I tell him about the experiment. He asks if it's a theatre project and I tell him it's not. He asks if he can ask why I'm doing it and I tell him I'll explain after we've made eye contact. He agrees to participate and I start the timer.
Our session is relaxed. For my part, I am intentionally trying to connect with him as deeply as I can, as deeply as he'll allow. I can sense that while he is an active participant he is also somewhat guarded.
We talk about my motivations for the project and get introduced. His name is Greg. He agrees to let me use his photo.
Greg has a theatre background and we talk about LMEC from that perspective. We talk about how LMEC can be considered performance art and the ways in which I am playing a role when I engage people for LMEC. There is a script (that I know and they don't) and both people are playing a role -- initiator and participant -- in the scene. The premise provides structure for improvisation, and since we haven't met before we really don't know what's going to happen. This is different from two actors playing together. In such a case both people have more context: they know the rules, they know what is motivating the other person to engage in the scene, and they may even have met and acted together before. The uncertainty and variability in LMEC is especially present for the participant because they don't see the scene coming, I intentionally withhold some context from them (namely, I don't answer the "why?" question until after I get a "yes" or "no" from them), and they don't know what will come after the eye contact session.
Through my conversation with Greg I realize that this is an experiment to see how unguarded, deep, and vulnerable a participant stranger will get with me through eye contact (and conversation) when placed in an intimate, unexpected situation where they don't 100% know my motivations.
We also talk about Greg's personal experience in the session, particularly how he was in fact remaining guarded even while agreeing to participate. He is aware of his own shy tendencies and guarded behavior, and he'd like to be less like that. Our interaction gave him an opportunity to look at this aspect of himself and reflect on it.
After our unexpectedly great conversation I get his contact info and we part ways.
Thanks, Greg, for the stimulating perspective on LMEC!